Five Minute Friday: Broken

It’s 5-minute Friday again. Today’s prompt is: 


Not unexpected considering that today is Good Friday. The day my Savior died. The day He became battered and broken for all of our brokenness. The day we saw what all of the brokenness looked like and what it took to heal us. 

Where do we find the words? How could we ever describe- really what that brokenness feels like or looks like down deep within us? 

My broken shows up in my head unannounced. A moment that panic rises to the surface. A nasty word followed by more nasty words. The look I give in deep displeasure and disapproval of what I see that makes others cringe and feel smaller than me. A deep dislike of self that grows and gobbles everything inside me til it erupts and spills over on everyone and everything in a nuclear waste dump and projects itself outward causing more breaking. The implosion afterward and the tears washing over in shame, regret, doubt. Fear. Sadness. Overwhelming sadness. Grief unmeasured. 

That’s what I am in the broken. There are times when I get a hint that it’s going to show itself again and I immediately see myself take all of that life-sucking emotion and head out to the back fence with my best china in hand and throwing it as hard as I can at the fence and watch it shatter with the force that’s been building up, closed in down deep within me. Sometimes it works. For the moment. Visualization running rampant in my head…

But, you and I both know the ONLY remedy for my brokenness is Him. All of Him. In me. And nothing of me in me. 

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever–the Spirit of truth.The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you. John 14:16-20 


Words Overheard

I was sitting in my local coffee establishment the other day, tucked away in a sunny corner sipping my non-fat latte when I over heard these words from a woman to her male colleague:

“Girls who have sex feel something in their hearts. It’s not just hello, goodbye. This generation, they feel nothing. For them it’s like going to Starbucks and ordering a coffee: “You want to have sex?” “Sure.”

Such sadness I heard in that mother’s voice from deep in her heart. She wanted something more for her daughter. Respect. Relationship. Commitment. Something down deep that she has recognized is missing. She’s heard it when she listened to her daughter talk about her friends. “So and so went home with K last night.” “Are they serious?” mom asked. “No” said the daughter with a laugh in her voice. “People just sleep together, mom. There’s no relationship, no strings.”

Mom is reflecting on what her daughter has said to her. She wonders, ‘is my daughter doing this too?’ She sees no emotional attachment whatever from them. She wants to know ‘What is this generation thinking?’

There was no way I could interject myself into the conversation that day. They moved on to talking about their professional lives after they left the subject when the male colleague commiserated with her saying that he just didn’t understand what they were thinking either. He expressed what it was like for boys when he was growing up. Words like respect, in the locker room and other words came from his mouth. No help there. I could see it in her eyes when she looked up, her reflection in the window.

 What I could do I did.

 I have become a clandestine pray-er. When I’ve heard things or saw things occur I’ve turned to the Lord to ask for provision for that person.  There have been occasions when I’ve been able to insert myself into conversation, but that was not to be that day. My heart was breaking for this mom. Her child is an adult, she can make her own decisions. Yet this mama’s heart recognized that what was happening was not right.

These parents are concerned for their children and their hearts; yet they do not understand what is missing because they themselves are missing Him in their own lives. In the end, because they have no answers, they will throw up their hands and claim they just don’t understand.

But, I’d like to say this to that young woman, to any young woman, be she 16 or 26:

“Hey there, sweet thing, you there, with your whole life ahead of you. There’s vast horizons ahead, full of hope and dreams of success. I see the anticipation in your bright eyes for what’s to come. I also see something else there, in the corner of your eye peaking out; the desire to be loved but not sure where to go or who to go to.  You look up. Across the room, I see it. Your eye catches his.

That one there–him.  Your heart whispers: ‘Would he love me?’ or ‘Would he use my body and walk away?’

Would you even realize that he had taken something from you that you don’t know how to get back? Will you be stolen from, like your friend there? I see it in her eyes, too- it shows behind that all-together look she presents to the world. I also see bewilderment-wondering how she ended up where she is and is this all there is?  She’s whispering to herself: ‘I guess I’ll always feel this way. That’s just how it is in this world.’

Oh dear one, there’s more, so much more for you. I don’t know you. I probably won’t ever even pass you on the street. But I can pray for you, for your friends, for your hearts to be protected by His love and grace. For someone to bring that word you are longing to hear-He Loves You, He Made You, He has a plan for You, He won’t ever leave you. He can take those feelings away and give you new feelings and He can remove that insecurity forever. You are His Child and don’t know it. Yet.”

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5: 6-8

My friends, become a clandestine pray-er with me? You may be the only person who prays for someone today.


Small Town Texas… A Visit

 It’s a sunny Saturday in late winter and we arrived in Lockhart just in time to eat. We came for the barbeque and for a look-see around town. There seems to be a rivalry as to whose establishment has the best in Texas. Not a surprise- this is Texas and stories of rivalries abound here. From ranches to restaurants, from towns to high school football teams. This is Texas.


High noon on the courthouse clock indicates it’s time for dinner (or lunch as it’s known to the rest of the world.) To show you the actual meal would be cruel since you can’t smell or taste the goodness that is barbeque!



The courthouse is a beautiful late 1800s building that is the centerpiece of Lockhart.

{Yes, I was playing with effects.}



The architecture of the old buildings all around the square are comforting and charming at the same time.  



The old red brick Brock Building now houses a clock museum on its first floor.



The First Christian Church was built the same year as the Brock Building and is just as beautiful.



Old signs are scattered around town- neon signs, and fading painted walls remind us of what once was.




And what Texas town would be complete without a saloon?



It’s Saturday in Texas.